OK, it’s time we have a national dialogue about the travesty known as “turkey bacon.”

Boudica2015

boudica-uslogo-leftOK, it’s time we have a national dialogue about the travesty known as β€œturkey bacon.”

For unknown reasons, my wife insists on bringing this illicit substance into our home. Worse, she will sometimes tell me she has β€œmade bacon,” only to have me discover, once I’ve skipped happily into the kitchen with joyous anticipation, that she has not made bacon at all. She has made turkey bacon. Which is not bacon. This is like telling me you’ve made chocolate chip cookies, but instead of giving me a cookie you kick me in the shin and set me on fire.

Let’s be clear: you cannot cut something into thin strips and call it bacon any more than I can vomit into a waffle cone and call it strawberry ice cream. Bacon is bacon. It is perfect and beautiful and God loves it just as it is. Turkey bacon, on the other…

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